The Honest Truth About Grief Here are three honest truths about grief that everyone should know.

Grief is forever. This is hard to hear, but vital to understand. The sooner you accept this, the sooner you will be able to adapt to and deal with your grief.
It’s ok to not be ok. Grief is harsh, constant and overwhelming – especially at first. Let yourself feel those emotions and don’t be ashamed of it. Recognizing your grief allows you to be one step closer to conquering your journey with grief.
Everyone grieves differently, so don’t be so hard on yourself. There is no one way to go about the grieving process. There are a lot of articles out there offering suggestions and remedies to help your grieving process, but it is important to find what works best for you. Simply because someone found relief in one method doesn’t mean you’ll experience the same result. Know that’s it’s ok to find comfort in things other may not understand.

Although the points discussed above were very raw and honest, here’s the good news: Although grief is tough and may not ever truly go away, it does change over time. Grief becomes a part of you, it mellows and, most importantly, it makes you stronger. Right now, you may think that what you’re feeling will never subside, but you will become genuinely happy again at some point. Life will go on.

The mission of Abode’s Bereavement program is to provide the best bereavement program for our clients, their communities, and our staff. When Mark S., Abode Hospice Bereavement Coordinator and Chaplain, discovered that a recently deceased patient, Clyde, was an unattended veteran, he set into action. As a first step, Mark reached out to the community Clyde resided in. When Clyde passed, the community he lived in was grieving. He had no family nearby, simply a sister who was unable to travel due to age. Mark reached out to the community to meet with them and provide support. It was discovered Clyde was an unattended veteran and would be buried at Pike’s Peak National Cemetery, with only Mark and the funeral staff guaranteed to be there. Something had to be done to make sure this veteran was not laid to rest alone. While working with the funeral home and local VFW, word got out about Clyde’s funeral and that he had no family able to attend. As a result, the media blew up. Facebook, newspapers, TV stations – it was unbelievable. The day of the funeral arrived accompanied by a snowstorm. Schools, businesses, and roads were closed due to the treacherous conditions, but the community of Colorado Springs still showed up. Hundreds of people from the community and local Military groups in uniform all came so Clyde would not be laid to rest alone. Cars lined the road as the cemetery began to overflow. Snow fell as the bagpipes played while he was walked to the front of the crowd in the beautiful casket Evergreen Funeral Home donated. “The way the community came together to honor Clyde was like nothing I had ever seen before,” Mark, Bereavement Coordinator & Chaplain, stated in awe. Mark accepted the flag on Clyde’s behalf and has contacted the VFW where his sister lives so they can personally present it to her. She is forever grateful for this gesture. It’s true that you don’t truly understand the unabashed power of community until you are a part of one. The community of Colorado Springs showed up for this unattended veteran and demonstrated that he was not alone. “To the hundreds of individuals that showed up to pay respect to a man you didn’t know, thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Thank you for standing together as a community of proud Americans to honor a Veteran who sacrificed for our country. Thank you to the amazing team at Abode Hospice for taking care of people and always going above and beyond.” – Christal Ransom York, Director of Public Relations & Community LiaisonAlright. Breathe. Don’t panic. Valentine’s Day is just around the corner, and I know some of you are dreading this day. While this holiday can be tough enough for some of us, those who are grieving this Valentine’s Day may have it worse. While your intentions may be to spend the day alone and sad, I challenge you to push through and celebrate this day. Okay, hear me out. I understand that grief and Valentine’s Day don’t mix well but try these options for making it through yet another holiday without your loved one.

Light a candle in honor of your loved one. It’s okay to think about them on this day and remember the love you had for each other. Allow yourself to be present in your loved one’s memory and feel all those emotions.
Bring a card or flowers to someone else who is feeling down this Valentine’s Day. Redirecting your grief and trying to connect with those who are also grieving on Valentine’s Day can help you put a positive spin on the holiday.
Invite a group of people over for a casual get together. Trust me, you aren’t the only one who doesn’t want to be alone this Valentine’s Day. Connect with others who are feeling the same way as you or those who may not have someone to be with this holiday.
Have some quiet time. While surrounding yourself with loved ones on this day will be a huge help, it’s also important to take some time to yourself.
Believe that next year will be a little easier. I promise, things will get better and it won’t always be this hard.

Valentine’s Day will never be the same without your loved one, and that’s okay. Planning ahead and incorporating some of these tips throughout the day can help relieve the stress and create a new meaning for this holiday. Just remember – Love never dies.

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